At the start I (well dad really) tell you how the world was made. Then I tell you how Eve led Adam astray and how the snake (really Satan - my old adversary) got involved. I also take time to tell who begot who. It's all there. Just skim through and you'll find all the answers.
I mean, how much more bloody obvious do you want me to make it? Are you thick or something?
You may be wondering why it's called the Holy Bible. Well, in the old days paper wasn't of such great quality as it is today and often developed holes. Ha ha that's an old joke that me and dad often make! See, I DO have a sense of humour.