Angry Jesus ties up some loose ends.

Today's surmon was inspired by one of my flock who does a good job pushing my cause and who will definitely be with me in Heaven one day.
Okay, there are people around this blogging scene who are atheists and keep questioning my word. They will go to Hell, so I'm not too worried about them, but lets just ties up a few loose ends.

I hope everyone reading has read Genesis. Just a little aside but one day I was giving a surmon on Genesis and I said Genitals by mistake. Yes, even I make the odd mistake.

Everything was created by Dad.

Sometimes Dad likes to

dress up.

He made Adam and Eve. The idea was that Eve would be used to populate Jasper (aka Earth) but there was a bit of an incident and Dad was really pissed off. He set up a little test and Adam and Eve failed, with a little help from Satan. Really Dad should have seen it coming and not have been so pissed off, but there you go.

Does His anger prove that he couldn't

see the future?

Dad was in the love making business and became a bit like a mum.

Okay flock, let's get those teeth

cleaned and then into bed. I'll come

and read you Genesis shortly and

then it's lights out.

Dad had some very naughty children on Jasper (aka Earth) and needed to find a way to forgive them.

He worked out five options:

1. Just forgive them and start again.
2. Give them a strong verbal warning and then forgive them.
3. Show them how powerful He was as a warning.
4. Send the naughty people to something resembling a room to think about what they had done.
5. Offer His own son (me) as a human sacrifice to put the slate clean.

He went with option 5. A bummer for me.

Okay, so Dad is teaching you all something here. He's teaching you how to behave as parents. Remember Dad has a plan and it is He who sets up your morals.

Might pay to have a bit of spare timber lying around if you want to be a good parent like Dad.